Satori Komeiji stars in an anime
by IgnitionSkyer
Summary: A global threat has recruited people to help him check if his new anime is safe to air on TV.


Chapter 1: The anime

Dmitry Filimonov laughed heartily. He had just written up a new anime.

"Ahaha! This is an amazing story, everyone will love it." He was reciting the words of people who would see his anime and be all in love with it like.

"Now I must safety test my anime" He said, as he leapt through the window. He got on his bicycle and headed to the nearest fast food restaurant.

Inside the fast food restaurant was none other than Satori Komeiji. Filimonov happily walked up to her.

"Hello Satori Komeiji you are my favourite anime girl and I have written you into my new anime."

Satori stared at him, clutching her whip. "Are you taking the piss?"

Then Filimonov got his favourite chloroform rag and gagged her with it, he pulled her out of the shop and into his Filimonov mobile. "Excelsior!" He yelled as he took his new pet home.

Chapter 2: The gathering of the characters from the anime

Satori's eyes peeled themselves open, something was up.

"Hello?" She remembered being gagged.

Dmitry Filimonov emerged from the shadows and shook her hand. "Good evening, now that you're awake we can make my super extra awesome anime happen in real life! You should meet your fellow actors first."

"Hullo." Muttered Bowser. Satori looked hatefully at Bowser, he was very sketchy.

"Hello Satori, are you going to be in Lord Filimonov's totally mondo new anime too?" Asked Sanae Kochiya. She was wearing one of those minimalist BDSM outfits, Satori blushed for her.

"Shut up." Said Nyarlathotep. He karate chopped Sanae round the head and considered exposing her nubile young mind to the tempered madness of the beyond. That would be a real show ender though so he gave her a dog biscuit.

"Hahahaha that is classic interactions my friends." Peter Griffin added. He thought it was funny when people accepted dog biscuits from their owners.

Nyarlathotep didn't watch Family Guy so he was confused and a little unsettled.

An unfamiliar face gazed over to the disquiet, sickened. "Fucking gay peasants." Said Richard II.

SarisKhan - a gmodder - was there too. He stayed quiet as he was afraid of hitting people.

Satori tried to get up, surprisingly there was no restraint. The door was barred though, meaning they were all stuck in there. Filimonov walked back in holding a pistol and some sheets of paper.

"Okay you guys" He said. "I'm going to narrate, learn your lines and when I fire this starting pistol we will begin.

Everyone studied their lines silently for an hour.

Chapter 3: New extra tubular hit anime

*Bang*

Filimonov's eyes flared with excitement. "One day in the valley of Hyrule, the beautiful young Satori Komeiji was preparing for her abortion."

Lying, strapped to an operating table, Satori said "But I am not pregnant this sucks"

Filimonov continued "She was denying her pregnancy because she didn't like rape because as you'll see..." He said as he wildly signalled for the next scene "She was definitely raped mercilessly by SarisKhan who wanted to breed a new heir to his fear of bugs."

People bought a new backdrop in and SarisKhan entered.

Saris stood six feet tall and was wearing a towel. "And now, we must create the most afraid person. I am terrified of bugs and you are scared of rape, we are perfect for each other."

To Satori's surprise, SarisKhan began violently raping her and enjoying it.

"Wh-what the fuck? Stop!" She yelled, as she reached for her whip but found out it has been glued into her pocket.

Filimonov smiled at his actor's dedication and continued to read. "Just then, from space, an angel appeared to help out Satori!"

Sanae walked onto the set wielding a rake. "Stop villain!" she yelled to SarisKhan.

"Make me!" He snapped as he continued to violate the disturbed youkai.

"You asked for it mook, I'm gonna knock you right over!" Sanae yelled. She hit Saris with the rake so hard some of its teeth broke off and lodged in his face.

"Thank you" Satori begrudgingly recited.

"Fear not! Even though you have been raped I have bought you a coupon that will get you a free abortion!"

SarisKhan started to cry from pain, disrupting the performance. Everyone tried to ignore his obnoxious wailing. "Y-you guys don't wanna make me mad! You do that and you'll know all about it." He added.

Filimonov yelled over him. "MEANWHILE BACK IN THE PRESENT."

Satori staggered back on to the operating table, feeling unsteady after losing her virginity so unexpectedly. "Now it is the present and I will get that free abortion" She expectorated slowly.

"But trouble was afoot" Filimonov ominously stated.

"Hahahaha!" Yelled Peter Griffin as he ran on set holding a measuring tape and a ruler, while wearing a bicycle helmet. "I am the proportion kaiser and I will change proportion!"

Before she could respond, Satori was accurately measured by the proportion kaiser's terrifying measuring tape.

"Five feet and six inches, hmm?" He announced, happily. "That's too bad because I say it's now three feet and one inch! HAHAHAHAHA!"

Then the proportion kaiser jumped out of the window.

The doctor came in. It was Nyarlathotep. "Okay ma'am what kind of abortion would you like today, regular, coat hanger or firearm penetration abortion?"

"Whatever this coupon gives me." She responded, handing it over.

Nyarlathotep put his glasses on and scanned it. "This gives you -1 free abortions. I personally don't want to do it but I can call a guy to impregnate you if you want."

Satori jumped back "N-no! It was one free abortion!" Then she realised the proportion kaiser was more cunning than he seemed.

Satori stormed off set and right up to Peter Griffing.

"I'm not acting right now, don't hurt me!" He squealed, but Satori sank her youkai fangs into his neck and started sucking the blood from his fat loser carcass.

"Do you know what this stupid kid's going to do to my physique?!" Satori yelled, as she backed up to breathe before creating a new incision.

"Fu-huh-huh-huhhhcckk" Cried Peter Griffin as he became paler and died. SarisKhan looked up at the youkai girl draining the fat man of his life fluid.

"Holy shit, are you a... A BUG?!" Saris asked. Satori turned around, disappointed by his dimness and replied. "Yes. Of course."

Saris screamed like a loser and tried to run but Filimonov grabbed him and handcuffed him to a table. Filimonov re-assured him. "Nobody runs from anime, SarisKhan! It's just people acting!"

Sanae wheeled the fridge into the room. She froze as she saw the proportion kaiser dead before her holy baby slaying eyes. "No! My lord!" Were the few words that emerged from her because she was a double agent.

Sanae growled and shook her fist at Satori. "We almost cursed you with infinite rape too! At least it's too late for your little pal here." She laughed as she opened the fridge displaying Richard II's dismembered remains.

"Now you listen to me ffffffucker." Saris slyly instructed Nyarlathotep. "I don't think you're running a very holy business. I'm shutting you down.

Nyarlathotep tore his hand off and let his wrist-wound ejaculate various arachnids, moths and less notable insects all over SarisKhan. Screaming and flailing in agony, the gmodder gave declared his creed "I hate bugs and abortion and I will destroy you for bringing them both here!"

"When will I get to come on stage?" Asked Bowser.

Filimonov turned to Bowser viciously. "Fuck off and wait."

Sanae began clearing the bugs off of SarisKhan. "It's okay, I have destroyed them. Now we must stop abortion and avenge the proportion kaiser!"

Sanae began to sing her magic song, which caused Bowser's head to explode because it one-shots all Mario characters.

Her song gave SarisKhan extra power, he chuckled as he bordered super saiyan.

Nyarlathotep attempted the doble impacto, his swift blow would have crushed Sanae had he built up enough momentum, but he was tripped by Satori.

Satori stood up and declared "You owe me an abortion! Do it now!"

The embodied disharmony chortled at its lack of an arm. SarisKhan laughed maniacally as he became a super saiyan. He levitated off of the ground, flexing his supreme body's joints.

Sanae suddenly threw a bunch of lightsabers on ropes through him, she was puppeting him. "I have fooled you y'know" She smugly informed him. "I only granted you such power so I could use it for my own need. Now you will... mate with Satori again while I laugh at you!"

Against his will, super saiyan SarisKhan moved toward Satori, while Sanae sung Dragonforce to increase his power.

Dmitry Filimonov laughed. All according to plan, now he could save the day.

"And suddenly all the characters sucked so the super cool voice actor Dmitry Filimonov got in there and stopped them all."

Filimonov grabbed that light sword from Zelda Twilight Princess and charged forward.

He forced a slave collar on to SarisKhan, removing his powers and weakening Sanae's control. Sanae panicked when she saw the fifty-something year old guitarist voice actor guy moving toward her. "No, stop! I'm sick you can't hit me! I'll make you a super saiyan!"

Filimonov corrected her. "Silly little girl! Dmitry Filimonov is allowed to hit anyone!" Then he right hooked her round the face, removing half of her magical powers.

"You're a shoe" She muttered as she felt her abilities. Nyarlathotep became Viewtiful Nyarlathotep. Nobody saw it but Filimonov definitely heard that unmistakable noise.

Filimonov turned around and caught Viewtiful Nyarlathotep's gunblade mid-swing, and plunged his light sword into the abomination's chest.

Viewtiful Nyarlathotep screamed as he was purged from the realm. Filimonov stabbed the light sword into the ground and resumed fighting Sanae.

"Now to destroy them to victory" Filimonov added to the sound of him stamping on Sanae killing her.

He turned around to the final person, Satori.

He extended his hand to her, helping her up. "You've outlasted them, you are the greatest opponent of all and I respect you."

Satori blushed perhaps it would end. "Thank you mister Filimonov, does that mean I can go home?"

Filimonov slapped her and said "No I lied I hate pregnant people die die die." And he force-fed her her own third eye and he used hydro storm and she fell over dead.

Filimonov said "Шесть Пять"


End file.
